monday starting work in NUH. got a job in BTS. good. i can get to be with mz and yl. yay.

there are many things that happened in this one week. so much that i think im falling apart. i needed a pillar to lean on. but somehow, that pillar becomes weak. and in turn, the pillar have to depend on me. i felt so lost for the first time, in the mist of the reality crowd.

rmit, queenslands and one more uni (which i forgot) accepted me. i was really overjoyed. but then again, family are tying me down. i cannot go on what i wanted to pursue. felt that my hands and legs are all tied up by all the branches in the forest. it will just take time for me to slowly let go. pursuing my degree is still a must on my list. but i guess it has to be on a later date.

please dont do this to me anymore. i need you to have time management. management of your life. i need you to plan and put things into actions. right now, i just felt so stressed up. i felt that you are like my 2nd kid. a kid that i have to push and push, to rush you to get things done. the things is, i know friends around me are saying that im very impatient. but that's not the point if u are not doing anything about ur career right now.

i need a good break from all these.

how i wish im still a 4 year old kid, looking at the world and be so amazed by things, and unaware of reality around me.